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Old 07-13-2005, 05:59 PM
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Scruffy Scruffy is offline
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Default While we're on the subject of bad jokes.....

Here's a few for the scientific Set....

Very Special Scientific Measurements

Ratio of an igloo's circumference to its diameter = Eskimo Pi

2.4 statute miles of intravenous surgical tubing at Yale University
Hospital = 1 I.V. League

2,000 pounds of Chinese soup = Won Ton

1 millionth mouthwash = 1 microscope

Speed of a tortoise breaking the sound barrier = Mach Turtle

Time it takes to sail 220 yards at 1 nautical mile per hour =
knot-furlong

365.25 days of drinking low-calorie beer because it's less filling = 1
lite year

16.5 feet in the Twilight Zone = 1 Rod Sterling

large intestine = 1 semicolon

1000 aches = 1 megahertz

Weight an evangelist carries with God = 1 billigram

Basic unit of laryngitis = 1 hoarsepower

Shortest distance between two jokes = a straight line

Time between slipping on a peel and smacking the pavement = 1
bananosecond

Bath = 1 demijohn

453.6 graham crackers = 1 pound cake

Given the old adage "a journey of a thousand miles begins with a
single step," the first step of a 1-mile journey = 1 Milwaukee

1 million microphones = 1 megaphone

1 million bicycles = 2 megacycles

365.25 days = 1 Unicycle

500 millionaries = 1 seminary

2000 mockingbirds = two kilomockingbirds

10 cards = 1 decacards

1 kilogram of falling figs = 1 Fig Newton

1000 grams of wet socks = 1 Liter Hosen

1 millionth of a fish = 1 microfiche

1 trillion pins = 1 terrapin

10 rations = 1 decoration

100 rations = 1 C-ration
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